Breaking Inertia by Inertia

Erasmo Calzadilla

HAVANA TIMES, April 2 — I’ve gone a while without writing. I had to concentrate on coming up with a some quick pesos, which sometimes isn’t easy. As a result — being outside the realm of news, blogs, activism and reflection — I lost my momentum.

It only took a month for me to slide back into being a zombie and that alienated state in which most ordinary Cubans live – which I imagine is the same with most workers around the world. With that pause, I lost my drive, my interest and the sense of writing.

One of the advantages and attractions of a blog is the chance for others to get to know the personal life of the author. But those of us who contribute to this website and many other sites here in Cuba, we can’t afford that “luxury” of simply describing how we are.

No, we have to be careful and keep well abreast of things in the middle of this war so as not to say anything ridiculous or get ourselves or someone else in trouble.

Writing requires all that effort, not to mention the time and resources needed for a journalist or an intellectual involved in this difficult task.

For a while I took up the challenge, but at this point I’m just exhausted.

So now, with nothing to contribute concerning the national situation or any other public issue, and with the ever-present fear of screwing up, I find myself trapped in this blogger inertia.

With this diary entry I’m trying to break out of it, though my motivation remains absent.

By the way, my introduction is outdated: Now I’m 37 years old and for quite a while I haven’t been a university professor.