HAVANA TIMES — I’ve noticed that some of my previous articles dealing with the issue of sex have stirred up a number of debates and also a bit of mockery. I would therefore like to touch on this issue again. I imagine I’ll find other related topics of interest later, as this is a rich and multifaceted issue for discussion.
As a teen, I used to talk about sex with my close female friends. When our bodies began to change, we started showing each other our pubic hair and incipient breasts, without the least bit of embarrassment. We were simply curious about these transformations.
We would send the kids we liked love letters and hide with them in dark stairwells to pet one another and improvise our first kisses (our teeth would collide, for we didn’t know we could use our tongues while kissing).
Once, we found an anonymous letter left outside my house, describing the sexual act in the most profane manner. This made us want to find out more about sex. Concealed things tend to be attractive, and the forbidden makes us jump over walls. It also leads to many misfortunes. There is no worse prison than ignorance.
These were the experiences we kids had back then. Today, I am completely open with my fourteen-year-old son. I explain to him how “things” work, something which would have been considered taboo in my day. My parents were the first to refuse to talk about sexuality. Even today, whenever there’s a nude scene in a movie, they get up and stop watching it.
I ran into this kind of prudishness throughout my youth and was forced to discover the world of sexuality through other means, through books and information friends gave me. The rest I learned through the experiences I had with my different boyfriends.
I believe programs dealing with the issue of sexuality should be offered as part of junior high school education, so that kids who are experiencing hormonal changes do not have to find out about sex from others who can be just as ignorant about these matters as they are, so that they do not have to suffer the consequences of not knowing and do not make hasty decisions in this connection.
I speak to my son in a simple manner, without relying on scientific terminology or resorting to vulgar expressions – in a clear and direct fashion.
Because of this, I was not in the least surprised when, one day, he asked me the way to put on a condom. On another occasion, he spoke to me about some rather “hot” homemade videos that have been going around computers on the island, which a classmate had recently seen.
These things tell us that times have changed. Sex, however, remains the same, and we must learn how to channel our desires.