By Irina Pino

A First Prize from the Alamar Art Salon in 2012.

HAVANA TIMES — Having an orgasm with love is the perfect combination, a powerful alliance which brings a couple together, as well as other interests, like friendship, children (if you have them) and all kinds of relationships.

On the other hand, you can’t deny enjoying an orgasm with somebody we randomly meet, anywhere, even if we’ve only seen them once, or on a night out (two or three drinks later, because it inhibits the effect), or as a result of flirting, which transforms iself and becomes a ticking time-bomb.

Women experience orgasms in different ways, some say it lies in the clitoris, others, in the vagina, or in a combination of the two: clitoris-vagina. Some of my friends have told me that they have had them when they have their anus and breasts stimulated. You generally discover the orgasm in adolescence during masturbation.

Similarly, different scenarios also make up part of the success in having an organism. Some women need a romantic, comfortable environment where there is wine and music. That also helps, of course, although it’s curious when women can only reach an orgasm in less obvious places, that is to say, on stairwells, roof terraces, hallways, hidden places from the public eye, where the danger of somebody walking in on them, can increase the level of sexual excitement.

Hidden things are seductive. For example, I had a stable relationship with a man and I loved him, but I had met another man, who I only used to see once a week, just to have sex. We always did it at his house, an isolated, remote place, full of pot-holed streets and dilapidated housing.

It was a long journey there from where I used to live, but that didn’t stop me, the key here was the absolute passion he gave me, a person who had very little or nothing to do with me at all, but nevertheless, I was willing to put him up there with my other priorities at the time.

For him, mental, provocative foreplay was very important. He would call me from the night before our encounter to tell me about his hottest fantasies.

On the day of our meeting, from the moment I got into a taxi, I would picture what would happen between those walls, in an extremely modest place, located in the basement of a building.

Although I would stop for a moment when I left there on several occasions with a strange feeling, as if I secretly regretted having so much pleasure and not loving him. However, I would always go back the next week, without even a pinch of guilt.

This reminds me of a story by Jenny Diski, Housewife, where a 40-something year old woman keeps a happy home with her husband, but also has a relationship with a young man at the same time, founded on their passionate encounters. They usually write letters to each other, relating their sexual fantasies, and that arouses them before they see each other.

She loves her husband and has orgasms with him, but she enjoys the more carnal and mental aspect of sex with her lover, and with him, her orgasms are mindblowing.

Irina Pino

Irina Pino: I was born in the middle of shortages in those sixties that marked so many patterns in the world. Although I currently live in Miramar, I miss the city center with its cinemas and theaters, and the bohemian atmosphere of Old Havana, where I often go. Writing is the essential thing in my life, be it poetry, fiction or articles, a communion of ideas that identifies me. With my family and my friends, I get my share of happiness.

5 thoughts on “Orgasms, orgasms…

  • On our next trip to Havana (May-June) my girlfriend and I would like to invite you out to dinner. She loves reading your articles and told me she is someone I would like to meet on our next trip.

  • Woooooowwwwww!!!!!! Thank you Irina for a very honest/informative article. I’m not sure if I should be shocked (to see such article printed in HT) or thankful for an insightful information in regards to how some women feel about love/sex/pleasure.

    I think what it culminates in, is individual commitment and loyalty. There is no question that when mates are together for a while, the intensity of sexual pleasure may dissipates somewhat over time. Then it really becomes a question of the level of commitment and loyalty one partner feels towards their other half.

    After all, even if you have had the best of any type of physically gratifying experience in the world then ANY type of an alternative experience will feel better than what you have been used to ALL the time.

    It becomes a matter of loyalty, that’s when you forgo partaking in a more pleasurable experience as a matter of loyalty or commitment you made to your mate.

    I can’t quite honestly say that this article is a surprise, as I have witnessed many such infidelities committed by either mates in a relationship. It is just the nature of the beast. People seem to gravitate towards whatever gives them more pleasure despite how this may destroy their mates if they discovered the betrayal.

  • You need to read the article again. There’s no confusion whatsoever and she states it much more eloquently than you do.

  • What a perfectly typical Cuban mindset.

    How refreshing.

  • One should not confuse great sex with love!!

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