Reflections on Mother’s Day
The Weight of Silence, and the Pain of Broken Bonds
By Luis Rondon Paz
HAVANA TIMES – With Mother’s Day approaching, I found myself reflecting on the tangle of emotions that this day evokes. For many, it’s a moment of celebration, a day to honor and appreciate the maternal figures in our lives. But for some of us, it’s a day loaded with complex feelings and silent struggles, especially when distance and circumstances keep us physically separated from our mothers and loved ones.
I have spent several years silently battling severe depression, with each Mother’s Day serving as a stark reminder of the abyss that separates me from my own mother and other family members who were once very close to me. The weight on my chest grows heavier as I acknowledge the painful truth: I may never have the chance to embrace her again. I made the personal decision to avoid any communication with them for my own preservation.
They tried to destroy in my own country and almost succeeded. Even now, after six years of beginning to rebuild a life elsewhere, it pains me to see that my loved ones cannot simply let me go. I am aware of how bad things are in Cuba and of my mother’s sadness at my departure. But what they don’t understand is how unhappy my life was while I pretended to live a reality that was never truly mine; although some knew it and preferred to look the other way.
It angers and deeply hurts me that today, after all this time, certain members of my family, whom I cherish and who claim to cherish me, refuse to let me live peacefully away from it all. They don’t understand that I can’t do anything for them from a distance, that the simple act of calling them, writing to them, and this inability to respect boundaries only adds more pain.
Amidst this whirlwind, I have found solace in the silence of my own heart. Unable to bear the weight of communication, I have chosen to express my unconditional love in silent gestures, knowing that it’s the best I can do for both of us. It’s a form of self-preservation, a way to protect myself from the relentless onslaught of pain and trauma.
As I navigate another Mother’s Day in the shadow of separation, I realize the importance of empathy and understanding. We never know the silent battles others are fighting, the wounds that may never fully heal. Let us hold each other up, offering love and support in whatever form it may take.
In these moments of distance and difficulty, let us remember that love transcends physical boundaries, and that emotional support can bridge any distance. Although our mothers may be far away, their influence and love endure in our hearts.
With sincere wishes for strength and unity.
Read more from the diary of Luis Rondon here on Havana Times.