Yes, I Drank the Coca Cola of Oblivion

It is not a real drink, but a symbol that I needed to forget, find inner peace, and heal, or as we say in good Cuban; give myself a chance.

By Luis Rondon Paz

HAVANA TIMES – Five years have passed since I left Cuba in search of freedom in foreign lands, far from the political whirlwind and the specters of my other life. Today, some friends that I re-found tell me that “I drank the Coca-Cola of oblivion”, and yes, I drank it with every right, and for my own well-being.

Here is a little history: In 2018 I left in absolute secrecy, few people knew about my supposedly temporary departure, and when I arrived at my final destination I made the decision that few could understand.

Risk everything for a new life.

In the process of adaptation, I cut ties with everything related to Cuba: I changed my phone number, deleted my social media accounts, and distanced myself from any conversation related to politics, especially linked to my homeland. It was not an act of indifference, but a desperate attempt to heal.

I left Cuba with the fear of losing my life, disillusioned by a society that had deeply disappointed me. The disappointment, betrayals, and mental torment were unbearable. My mental health deteriorated, and I was faced with a choice: continue drowning in paranoia, fear, pain, and a lot of hate, or find a way to start again.

Obviously, I opted for the latter.

So I decided to take a metaphorical sip of the “Coke of oblivion.” I must clarify that it is not a real drink, but a symbol that I needed to forget, find inner peace, and heal, or as we say in good Cuban; give myself a chance. Mental health is like an iceberg, much of it lies beneath the surface, hidden from view. That’s where I needed to focus my attention.

It has not been an easy path. There are days when irrational memories flood my mind. But there were also days when I can breathe freely, which gave me the strength to smile every morning, and to seek help to rebuild my life in a new land, and little by little prioritize my mental well-being above all else.

My story wasn’t just about leaving a country, leaving behind journalism and “real” activism where you really put yourself at risk. It meant to abandon a way of life that served as an ointment to overshadow my demons. My priority became to reconcile myself and undertake a search for inner peace. Also to find the strength to put my own well-being first.

So, did I drink the coke of oblivion?

I drank it and for the better!

But remember something very important: taking care of your mental health is not being selfish, but an act of self-preservation and self-love.

Read more from the diary of Luis Rondon Paz here on Havana Times.